Oct 02, 2022

  Living in Unconditional Love (82)

“Love flows from God to humans without effort:

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings-

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul,

Yet separate in form.”

–Mechtild of Magdeburg

 

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years to the day that we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill, and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down almost two years, and even though it is abating, I wear my mask anytime I am out among people, unlike many.

10/02/2022                             This date, October 2^nd, 2022, is the fortieth anniversary of our house fire that destroyed our first home. It started as an electrical fire in a bedroom wall, then spread rapidly. The fire department thought they had it out, but it rekindled during the night and left only ashes in what used to be the lower floor. Our present house is on the same location, as the view is the reason the first house was here, and the view has not left. Still stunning at any time of the year; right now, the leaves are turning, and our tall maple tree in the pasture is solid red. That tree always turns early for some reason.

It is fun being here this week with two little ones racing around. The wee one, Mackenzie, who is almost 15 months, loves to pull open door and drawers and remove everything she can, sometimes putting some back. It appears to be her favorite activity. Toys everywhere is the rule of the day. It will be a challenge to reassemble some of the games they have pulled out and mixed, but Dan is working hard at that. Music is always on; dancing and swaying is common. At the moment on Saturday afternoon, they all went to a local apple festival while I did some grocery shopping and then mowed the lawn – it is growing like it is spring, not fall. The noise is high but usually joyful, but tears and howls are not uncommon. I remember those ages and days like this well.

The joy of family is not to be underestimated. Food is a challenge, as little ones at this age do not like changes, so finding something they will eat is always a challenge. They like some fruits, they have discovered the joy of cinnamon rolls (every morning now) most vegetables (especially peas), chicken, pizza, pork (not beef), and few more, including peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for Maria. Plus the breathtaking process of watching little ones think and have understanding. Both girls are bilingual, as Alesandra talks to them in Spanish and Dan in English. Maria (2½) answers Alesandra in Spanish and Dan in English, Mackenzie is just forming words but understands both.

God has indeed blessed me with delights. The various sources I use are wonderful and fill me with joy, but the noisy, joyful, and tearful life of the family fills my soul with untold wonder. The path from my childhood, meeting Eileen, and the process of all our seven children continues to unfold in the next generation. Alesandra is pregnant with their third girl, due late March. All this reminds me of the road that Eileen and I took so many years and memories ago.

Meditation

Gentle One, I am in wonder that You granted me this gift of joy, laughter, tears, and so much more at this time. It fills my heart with joy, but I wish deep inside that Eileen were here to enjoy it. She would be having a ball. I know that her spirit is here, it is palpable just watching the joy of little ones. I am grateful for the chance to taste this time of life.