Jan 30, 2022

  Living in Unconditional Love (47)

“Love flows from God to humans without effort:

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings-

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul,

Yet separate in form.”

–Mechtild of Magdeburg

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years to the day that we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill, and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down almost two years, and still going strong from my viewpoint, as I wear my mask anytime I am out, unlike many.

01/30/2022                                     Kind of one of those sad days as I empty my Christmas tree, ready to move it in the Garage. My son Tim and boys will do the moving, as it must be laid down to pass doorways, even though it has wheels (it is obviously not a living tree.) It will be stored in the garage in its wrapper until December, when the process will be repeated. All Christmas decorations (or almost all, as I will leave my door wreath in place until spring) are coming down next week, as I prepare for my journey to the deep south, Peru, in a couple of weeks.

Life is cyclic, each year having its seasons. We age a little, and life flows along year after year, until, for each of us it ends, and others take our place. Life is rich, giving joys and sorrows that move us to our core making our tapestry that is uniquely our own. I miss Eileen to share this with on the physical plain, but I know that I share this with her on the spiritual plain until we join again.

Enough maudlin. Life is still good, and yes, I listen to Christmas music much of the time. Our internet has been sporadic due to the storms, but most of the time it is present. The snow is beautiful but is cold; colder than any of the past winters. Our neighbor has claimed they had 18 below zero, but I saw only 8 below. Even that is colder than I have seen for about ten years and I haven’t seen below minus 15 or colder after the turn of the century. An old-fashioned winter, they claim. Hopefully my newer plants will stay alive, even though they may not bloom. Even the cold-hearty Rhododendrons will have a difficult time if it reaches temperatures like others have reported.

I have been using my ‘air-conditioner’ as a heating source. It was just installed last summer, and they claim that it becomes less efficient in heat mode at 17 degrees and stops functioning at 4 degrees. But to my surprise it has continued to keep the house toasty even at the extreme temperatures I have seen. Since I have three rooms on the same system (each with their own fan-controller system), I suspect it is running all the time, and it heats itself so it can keep going. My baseboard heat could not keep the house above 65 degrees when it was at zero or below, but I have a steady 70 in those rooms now, and still comfortable in the upstairs rooms without the units installed – I keep all doors open into the halls so the heat can spread. The lower floor is still heated by baseboard heat, and that is fine.

I am starting to get excited about heading to Peru in a couple of weeks, February 15^th, arriving on the morning of the 16^th. I fly out of Syracuse to Atlanta, then a six-hour overnight flight to Lima. I am going first class that has a stretch-out bed. Should be nice. Right now, I am only planning to stay for 8 days over the birthday of Maria (the 21^st) and the death anniversary of Eileen (the 22^nd) but depending on how I adjust to all I may extend my stay. Stay tuned.

My health is good, so I have no real complaints. I miss someone to talk with, but I keep the music going a good part of the day, so silence does not become oppressive. My hobbies and reading keep me busy, and there is always something I can do if I wish to. I have been sleeping much more than usual, like 10 hours last night and an hour nap this afternoon. I have not been going to Sunday Mass due to Covid, but I am going on Tuesday morning to my local church, St. Patrick. This past Tuesday there was only 5 there plus the priest, and he joined three of us downstairs for coffee and cake. Nice little community.

I found out a small fact about the sun that I find fascinating and thought I would pass it on. All the heat we see on the surface is generated in the extremely hot (11 million degrees) center of the sun where fusion takes place, then the photons travel outward to the surface where they are radiated out. It takes 8 minutes to reach us at the speed of light from the sun’s surface, but the sun is very dense, and it takes from 50,000 to 100,000 years to reach the surface that we see from the center, still traveling at the speed of light (180,000 miles per second), bouncing off particles at that speed inside the sun to finally reach the outside. Kind of boggles the mind. Just think: even if the center of the sun went out today, we would not feel it for 50,000-100,000 years! (No, it is not out – we have measured neutrinos generated just 8 minutes ago, since neutrinos travel through everything and move at the speed of light, so they do not bounce inside the sun. Science captures a few of these a year out of zillions generated (don’t know if ‘zillion’ is a word, but you know what I mean), but that is another story.)

Meditation

Gentle One, I rest in Your warmth and Love at this time of my life. Time flows on, and I find life kind and warm, as I see Your Love everywhere, even in the birds that I feed that are coming for warmth and life in the cold and snow. I am still astounded that You gave Eileen to be in my life for 60 years, granting me the awesome privilege of being a parent and graced by human and divine love. I feel humbled by this gift of life and give myself back to You in return for th