Apr 28, 2024

Living in Unconditional Love (164)

 

“Love flows from God to humans without effort:

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings-

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul,

Yet separate in form.”

–Mechtild of Magdeburg

 

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years after we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill (not COVID), and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down almost two years. Covid has proved to be a persistent problem, and many of the long-term effects are quite serious, and it has proven much more serious than flu.

04/28/2024                             It has been a quiet week, and I have had enough excitement in my life for a while. Spring is bursting all over, and the daffodils and other earlier bloomers are at their peak for me.  We had several sunny days, and I mowed the upper lawns for the first time this year. The mower started right up despite that it had not been run since last fall. The beauty of the spring flowers leaves me awestruck, and I rejoice in the bright scene outside. I had an opportunity to walk around and enjoy the freshness. I have some late blooming daffodils that haven’t started yet, and the early ones are finishing up, but it is still a wonder to behold.

My daughter in law Julie (Tim’s wife) had her knee replaced this past Tuesday, and it has been a rough week so far. Most patients come home that same day, but Julie is (Saturday) still in the hospital I believe. She fainted that first day trying to move to the bathroom, and since she is allergic to many painkillers it has been most uncomfortable for her. Hopefully she will be home soon, perhaps even by the time you read this journal entry. She had had ankle surgery in January on that same leg, and she is not a happy camper at this point. If all goes well, she should end up able to move around much more comfortably that she has moved in several years in a few weeks.

I find myself a little bit on the wobbly side when I first get up. It may force me to use the cane more often. Especially at church when I rise to receive communion I almost stagger, as the hard seats and the half-kneeling position I use leaves me a bit uneven. Aging is wonderful! But I AM aging! I definitely prefer that, for I find that life can still be good. I use the cane when I am out and about for any length of time, such as walking around the garden.

I don’t feel any different as I have been extremely lucky. Each day marches by (I am shocked to see the end of April approaching) and the time slides by one day at a time. I have few aches and pains but as I said my stability is not as good as I would like. My body tends to be slightly spastic anyway, and I have never been athletic in any way all my life. I am not surprised to see trouble in walking at times as I grow older. I have no problem around the house, but I use the cane when walking around outside or in most stores.

I am saddened by all the pain in the world now. Wars and bigotry continue on and on. It is especially sad to see the anti-Jewish demonstrations and other signs of hatred are visible in all parts of society. I have no recourse but to turn it over to God, and I pity the president as he tries to balance all these events.

Meditation

Gentle One, again I let myself rest in You as I look to the peace that passes all understanding. I plead for the people in our world that are in pain of human conflict but have had no part in it, and place all in Your care as that is all I can do. I trust that Your love hovers over all, and Your comfort will aid all.