Apr 02, 2023

Living in Unconditional Love (108)

 

“Love flows from God to humans without effort:

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings-

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul,

Yet separate in form.”

–Mechtild of Magdeburg

 

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years to the day that we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill (not COVID), and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down almost two years, and even though it is abating, I wear my mask anytime I am out among people, unlike most.

04/02/2023                                      I had two inches of snow this week, and the temperature fell to around twenty degrees. I did leave the bonsai outside, as they are next to the garage and protected. They had snow on them when I checked, but all are hardy plants, and I did not see any damage to any pots, but I will understand better when I place them on their stand for the summer later this week. Daffodils are growing like crazy, but none are blooming.

I still have not seen a robin here on my land, even though I have seen them down the road, and I will continue to feed the birds for another few weeks. I stop feeding when I feel the bears would come, sometime later this month. The weather has turned quite chilly, and that will slow things a bit, but more depends on soil temperature than air temperature, and it had been warmer earlier so the soil has had a chance to warm a bit.

I felt able to go for my first walk on the road this week, and hope to do that more often. Naturally my legs protested a bit that night, but it was a delightful experience that I intend to repeat often. I have physical therapy for my knee twice a week, and I see all there who have many more problems than I and it makes me thank God for the few health problems I have. Seeing that, it encourages me to spend more time moving around and seeing life as it awakens in the spring.

This is the start of the time of the year that Eileen and I enjoyed so much. We eagerly watched for the reddening of the branches of the trees in May, indicating that the leaves were in the process of emerging. Daffodils and other spring flowers would begin to appear, and the subtle changes would unfold bit by bit to our delight. Then the apple trees will bloom, and signs of the emerging delights will appear. I miss that shared excitement and delight that was always the central part of the coming of spring, and the times we would hold hands (and sometimes holding a glass of wine) and walk around looking at all the delights.

I still intend to walk around, and I will share in my mind all the delights with Eileen, knowing she is with me and smiling at all the wonders of nature, maybe even with a glass of wine.

I am so amazed at the wonders of God that have been placed in this journey through this part of my existence so that I can enjoy all. So many have so many extremely difficult problems, but right now I am blessed with few problems and many delights. Delightful young grandchildren (and wonderous older grandchildren) and untold beauty of nature are all in my scope of experience, so much so it is almost beyond understanding. Even as I write this a spring thunderstorm rolled through with the wonders of some rain and the awesome roll of thunder, but I did not see the lightening.

Meditation

 

Gentle One, You have delighted me with many joys and freedoms that so many my age no longer enjoy. I am grateful for all, and rest joyfully in Your Being. I ask for all to find peace within so that they may enjoy life as the gift it truly is. I continue to rest in all, and will strive to bring Your joy to all I interact.