Apr 09, 2023

Living in Unconditional Love (109)

 

“Love flows from God to humans without effort:

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings-

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul,

Yet separate in form.”

–Mechtild of Magdeburg

 

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years to the day that we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill (not COVID), and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down almost two years, and even though it is abating, I wear my mask anytime I am out among people, unlike most.

04/09/2023                                      Happy Easter to all! On Easter I will be at my nephew and niece’s house on Long Island for the annual Rogers’ Easter blast. With ten siblings, all with families, it can be quite boisterous but lots of fun. (I am writing this on Holy Saturday when I would normally be at church, but none of the parishes that I would attend and in easy driving time are having any services.) This is the first Holy Saturday I have not gone to the large service where the new candles are lit, water blessed, and many special blessings are performed, but the lack of priests has finally brought home how bad it is, and none of the churches that I would attend are having a service tonight. I will attend the 8:30 am Mass tomorrow (Easter Sunday) morning, then drive down to my daughter’s (Barbara) home and then we will proceed to Long Island (another two hours) and return that evening. I will stay at Barbara’s home Sunday evening and return Monday.

Since Easter will also be my 89^th birthday, I will be celebrating full time. I am looking forward to this annual visit that we have been doing for many years, first with Eileen and Barb then just Barb and i. We missed ’20 and I believe ‘21, but we talked on zoom some of the time, and we fully resumed last year.

My daffodils are just starting. I have some early miniature ones that are in full bloom, and after walking around the yard yesterday discovered many that are showing color. Some early ones on the septic mound have started to bloom, and this next week should see an explosion of color. I am really looking forward to seeing them.

The bonsai are on their stands, and they look nice. The weather is cool, and they have not started leafing out yet, so they only get watered every other day. that will change sometime this month. I am starting to see buds on the tips of many of them, so growth has started and will suddenly increase rapidly.

The deer have denuded many of my rhododendron that are located away from the house. I will have to use protection on them next winter to prevent it when the snow gets heavy in late winter. They are safe all summer, and it is only when the weather is poor and there is snow on the ground in February and March that I have problems, and this is the worst I have seen.

Drew came by today (Saturday) to wish me happy birthday, and we chatted all afternoon, had dinner (chicken wings using Eileen’s special sauce, mashed potatoes, and cheese sauced broccoli). We walked around the pond (which looks good, but I have not seen any fish) despite the cool breeze and brisk temperatures. It looks so nice, clear skies, hardly a cloud, but quite cool.

This Lenten season has been a strange one for me, with the third anniversary of Eileen’s death on Ash Wednesday, Maria’s (Dan and Alesandra’s oldest) 3^rd birthday on Mardi-Gras, the Tuesday before Ash Wednesday, and my birthday on Easter Sunday. This unusual coincidence of dates has moved me over the course of the season, encouraging me to give thanks for all that has occurred in many unusual fashions in my life. Today is Holy Saturday and marks the 63^rd Holy Saturday of Eileen and I first date, but the date was April 16^th and not the 8^th. Yes, I did tell Eileen that I wanted God to bless our first date, for it may be the start of something bigger, and was I right. The beginning a of 60 years of joy and laughter, and tears, but a wonderful life it has been.

Meditation

 

Gentle One, I place my life each day under Your care, depending on Your grace for peace and contentment. I am full of joy, grief, and happiness, a strange combination that somehow brings me contentment and peace. I am in awe of the many years of joy, laughter, tears, and wonder I have seen especially in the joined life with Eileen for 60 years.