Apr 24, 2022

  Living in Unconditional Love (59) 

“Love flows from God to humans without effort: 

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings- 

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul, 

Yet separate in form.” 

–Mechtild of Magdeburg 

 

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years to the day that we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill, and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down almost two years, and even though it is abating, I wear my mask anytime I am out, unlike many. 

 

04/24/2022 14 inches of snow! When I returned from Barbara’s on Monday, I saw signs along the highway – many of them – stating “major snowstorm – avoid travel”. But even so, I never expected to see 14 inches on Tuesday morning. Set all kinds of records. Heavy wet stuff that took down many trees and power lines. Today, Friday, almost all the snow has melted. I was lucky, only 24 hours without power, unlike many that still (Friday) do not have power, some only a few miles from my home. Plus, I have my generator, which meant I was down for 6 seconds! Of course, I was concerned about the propane lasting, as the propane tank will only supply 2-3 days’ worth of power. I have called to have the tank topped off, and they said that sometime next week. It is more important to keep those with generators but without power filled than to top mine off right now. 

From what I can see of the daffodils, the ones in bloom were squashed flat, but most had not started to bloom yet, and I can see, almost by the hour, spots of color beginning to show – it is in the 50’s and not a cloud in the sky. Hopefully I will still have a good showing. 

Today is Earth Day, a reminder about the dire straits of our environment. I won’t see the worst of the effects during my lifetime, but the world will suffer immensely in the future because of the greed and self-centeredness of so many, including one of the major political parties. It is a slow process and understanding just a bit about the massive effects of the thin air we have on our little blue ball we call home; it is not something that will quickly oblige us with change once we wake up and understand what is occurring millions if not billions will die, and all will have severe constraints on activity. This is our only home; there is no finding a new place to live. I find it hard to understand how others just ignore science; yet I saw it strongly in the denial of the virus we are now living through. 

I am still amazed at the refusal of so many to accept that plagues are real. Having a million die just in our country doesn’t faze so many. I had my tires changed today (Friday) and hardly anyone wears a mask anymore. Drew’s family and now Tim’s family have covid as we speak. I still am testing negative; took a home test yesterday. I just hope they do not have lasting effects like my daughter Janet.  

We have the means to save the lives of so many – yes, God has given us the means and the technology to know who and where and the means to deliver, but those of us who have the means (and therefore the responsibility) to feed the hungry, etc., don’t. I am no better – perhaps all I can do is give monies and speak out in forums like this journal, but I don’t do enough. 

God has been unbelievably good to me and those I know. I have more than enough, am very comfortable in my lifestyle, and could do more but find myself not doing more than I am doing.  

I am going back to Barbara’s home on Saturday and attend the play on Sunday she is directing at her church – The Sound of Music! I am really looking forward to that as I love that play and movie. I will wear my mask, for who knows –.  

Eileen’s birthday is May 1, and I will celebrate that day in her honor. I was blest to have her in my life as partner, friend, and lover for 60 years; how could I not lift a glass of wine to her on that day.  

Meditation  

Gentle One, You gifted me with this wonderful person 62 years ago; truly I am blest. Together we founded a new dynasty of beautiful people that have graced this world. I am saddened by the refusal of so many of Your children to acknowledge the plight of our world, as You have given us the means to understand and see the woes and to work to correct them as a team, but we selfishly too often turn our eyes away. Forgive us our refusal to see and help me to overcome my own reluctance to do more.