Dec 26, 2021

  Living in Unconditional Love (42)

“Love flows from God to humans without effort:

As a bird glides through the air without moving its wings-

Thus, they go wherever they wish united in body and soul,

Yet separate in form.”

–Mechtild of Magdeburg

My wife Eileen died from esophageal cancer in February 2020 one year after being diagnosed, 60 years to the day that we met on Long Island. Then my brother Tom became ill, and I spent a total of six weeks being with him in Ohio, but he died in October 2020. My sister-in-law Sue Mahoney died from Covid-19 in January 2021. On top of it all stood the pandemic, locking everyone down over a year and a half, and still going strong from my viewpoint, as I wear my mask anytime I am out, unlike many.

12/26/2021                                     Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. This will be short, as I am writing this on Christmas night. The tree is up and looks grand, and all decorations are in place. We (Barbara and I) had dinner with Tim and Julie and kids, and it has been a quiet time except for the laughter and joy of family for a few hours. Tomorrow two or three will be flying in from Ohio, and Janet will bring her son and my daughter Maureen. I said two or three since one of my granddaughters who was supposed to fly in tested positive for Covid and cannot come, and so we are attempting to swap another granddaughter in place.

We are still going to Mohonk Mountain House on Monday since all are vaccinated and have our booster shots. We will be careful, but it will be a great time to meet my brother-in-law and family, as it has been a couple of years since we saw them last at Eileen’s funeral. We had some snow on Thursday and Friday, and so we had a white Christmas at the start, but some light rain has melted most but not all. Hopefully some snow will still be here when family comes.

I feel blessed to be part of life. Missing Eileen, but the joy of life is still present, and laughter and humor and just presence make for a great time. I tend to be one to run and hide as I enjoy my quiet routines, and I need to push myself to enter into life more. When I do I enjoy myself immensely, but it still requires a push as I tend to hang back.

I spend as much time as I can meditating on the wonder of God and life. We have been given the gift on consciousness, and amazing ability to ask the simple question “why?”. No other creature on earth has been given that ability and we have not handled that ability well much of the time; then I read some wonderful poetry or other lyrical work or see a sunset or — and am lifted up to view creation in a new and fresh light. Christmas to me symbolizes the gift of God in bringing consciousness here and bringing me to taste that wonderous fruit.

See you next year.

Meditation

Gentle One, I feel Your joy in life even when mixed with the vastness of life’s pain. Today of all days is a wonder that gives me pause in the sweep of life. As my life moves towards its inevitable conclusion day by day, I am always struck at the simple joys that can be had for the taking. I have time now to stop and smell the roses, and hopefully will spend more time just enjoying life as it presents itself. Thank You for the chance to look once more, then once more.