Nov 25, 2018

The 12 Steps to Joy and Happiness (cont.)

 

We are looking at the 12-steps discussed in my book, The 12 Steps to Joy and Happiness, finding the “kingdom of God that lies within” (Luke 17:21).We have seen that these 12 steps are a derived from the 12-steps of Alcohol Anonymous (AA), the successful program used to help those with substance addictions find release and freedom. I use the connotation (AA) to indicate the steps of AA, and the connotation (JH) to indicate the steps in the new book on finding eternal Joy and Happiness.

We have looked at the process of finding true freedom, and discussed the first two critical phases of finding lasting joy and happiness. First, you have to accept that something is not right: we have fears, sadness, and a feeling of discontent in life, and you, by yourself, cannot fix it, but maybe, just maybe, the power that brought the universe alive and continues to do that can help. Secondly, it takes a total surrender into that power so that it can guide you and support you through life’s joys and sadness, forever.

Cleaning House

Now what? We still find our demons running our life, and see ourselves doing things (and not doing things) that spell problems and create difficulties; and life seems still a mess. Well, it is time to do a little housecleaning, to give room to that power we surrendered ourselves into to actually take control of the core of our life. We find ourselves cluttered with remnants of so many parts of our life that did not serve us well, and it is time ‘clean house’ so to speak, and start fresh

The demons of life are fierce, and will hog all of our life unless we are ruthless in flushing them out.  Only by looking at the demons straight in the face and deciding that you no longer wish to allow that particular demon to strangle you do we release that demon, or else they will continue to haunt your pathways.

Until you let the power of the universe remove them and start fresh. That release is what total surrender to the power of the universe, or God, will accomplish. But it is YOUR choice, for God will never override your will.

But you have to see those demons, one at a time, by name.

The original 12-steps of AA put it this way:

1. (AA) Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

I modified that step slightly, but with the same meaning:

4. (JH)We made a fearless examination of what was preventing us from surrendering our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.

It is critical to see the patterns on our lives to understand what has to be faced and released. This is not a guilt trip, this is a ‘catch-and-release’ trip, where we can see what is eating us up inside and causing us internal grief and shame, pushing us in acting in ways and having dead or strange feelings of abandonment in areas of our life. These areas prevent us from finding the sense of joy and happiness that is right there all the time, if only we see. After all. Jesus said it well: “The kingdom of God lies within.” (John 17:21) That is, heaven is right here right now, for those who have eyes of see.

Now what? If we are wise, we have written these down. Now comes the hard part: admitting we house these demons deep in our very being. Step 5 forces us to release these trapped demons and free our spirit to see the joy that is ours. The original 12-step of AA put it this way:

2. (AA)Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

My wording of step 5 is not that different:

5. (JH)We admitted to God, to ourselves, and another person the nature of our fears, resentments, worries, anxieties, and grievances.

Close, but spelling out areas that are specific for those of us who wonder what we could have done to merit that gloom and doom feeling rising in us so deeply.  We are the ones that gather all the stones and weights that accumulate in us over the years that slow us down, and prevent us from seeing the wonder that is right here and now, if we but pull the scales off our eyes.

The next step is to let God free us from these burdens of guilt. It is time, and NOW is the time. The original AA step 6 is as follows:

6. (AA)Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of characters.

My step 6 goes a bit further, and is follows:

6. (JH)We ask God to remove these barriers to a full and rich life – one filled with joy and happiness.

My step 7 explores the inner shadows that continue to pervade us with gloom and doom, and is quite different that the original AA step 7. The Original step 7 of AA is:

7. (AA)Humbly ask God to remove our shortcomings. I have included this critical step as part of the above step 6, and use step 7 as a way to take the further human growth path of accepting our weakness and stumbles as part of our humanity, but by placing them in God’s Being we realize we do not have to follow them to disastrous results.

      My step 7 accepts us for who we are, brambles and all:

7. (JH)We acknowledge both the light and dark elements of our nature as to who we are in the deeper reality of our being. God created us with all our shadows, both light and dark; they are ours and ours alone. We can choose to use them for better or for worse, it is our choice.

The AA 12-steps 8 and 9 continue to resolve the deep injuries that deep addiction usually includes, and are as follows:

8. (AA) Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9 (AA) Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

My step-8 is a little different in that rarely do most injure others so deeply that their lives are irrevocably affected, but we still must accept responsibility for the pain we have inserted into the world, and the healing we have failed to provide.

8. (JH)We take responsibility for our choices that have unintended consequences, including creating pain for others and ourselves.

We did these things that caused pain, or did not do things that would have eased pain, and they are our responsibility in life. God gives us opportunities that we accept or reject in our relationships, and it is often through our failures that we learn and grow, but these are our choices and no one else’s.

I will be discussing the remaining steps next time.

Meditation

My God, I place myself in Your care, for my own stumbling steps have been more harmful than good. I realize that only be total surrender into Your Being will I find true Joy and Happiness, as heaven reveals itself in every phase of my life. The universe is Your Life revealed, and I find myself breathless in wonder at all I behold. Life abounds in Your glory, even the winter scene outside is breathtaking in beauty. To look into the eyes of children reveals untold beauty and love; I bow in gratitude for all that is revealed in life.